Me, Inc. Read online

  YOU figure it out.

  YOU have to do the research.

  And YOU have to do it all yourself. Just like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Sir Richard Branson, and Mark Zuckerberg had to do.

  While there’s some truth to the old saying that ideas are a dime a dozen, if you can implement your idea, and make it happen, the idea grows arms and legs and becomes real.

  The implementation is more important than the idea itself.

  I’m going to do an experiment for you, as I sit here typing my own manuscript.

  I promise you, what I write below is something I will daydream, and come up with, right now—unedited. Here goes:

  Here’s an idea that just hit me: BABY 101. Hmmm. I don’t know what it means exactly, but I like the sound of that. Is the name trademarked? Let me check. No, it’s not.

  Okay, I just told my lawyer to trademark it.

  As stupidly simple as this sounds, this is how things often begin. There’s a gut sense of something sounding “established,” or “sellable.” There’s this intangible sense that some people have, that something is “catchy” or can be a “catch-all” name for a variety of ventures. The person who came up with “Amazon,” for example, may have been thinking of a river of books, but the title is elastic enough to apply to everything and anything under the sun—everything from A to Z. (Incidentally, this expression is incorporated via an arrow in the logo pointing from the A to the Z. Look it up.)

  Once I’ve secured the trademark, I’ll need to show that I’ve used it in other states, to shore up my trademark in the context of interstate commerce laws. So I’m going to make a BABY 101TM T-shirt myself, and sell it to someone I know in New York for ten dollars. And presto, I’m in business! Maybe I’ll make a logo for Baby 101 while I’m at it.

  So, what is Baby 101TM? Well, it can be whatever I say it is.

  How about this? It’s a TV show for young mothers and their babies.

  We all have to take driver’s end to learn to drive. Then we take a test, and if we pass it, we get a license to drive.

  But there’s no school for being a mother. There’s no public-school course to teach young men and women about the joys and pitfalls of having babies at too young an age. And when the blessed event happens and she gives birth to a healthy and happy baby, then what?

  What does the baby eat? How many times a day? Where do I get formula? Clothes? When does the baby sleep? How long? Does it need to be quiet? Or should I play music? What kind? If the baby is crying, what does that mean? The baby can’t talk, and Mom doesn’t understand baby talk.

  So the daily Baby 101TM TV show—you’ll notice I’m using TM right next to the title, which means it’s trademarked—would be a time for new or expecting moms to learn lessons in parenting. And if I own the trademark and I’m one of the executive producers of the show, that opens up a truckload of possibilities for merchandising. Of course, I’ll have to find a production partner to actually make the show, since I don’t want to and don’t know how to do that myself.

  The way I went about getting production partners was relatively easy. At the end or beginning of most TV shows, the production company has a credit. I wrote that information down, or simply Googled which production company did which show. Then, I called and arranged a meeting with the head of the company. Now, I grant you it won’t be that easy for you. Remember, a certain amount of celebrity will get you in through the front door. And in my case, it did and it does. But what happens when you sit down together is another thing. The idea or project either has “legs” or it does not. The production company either sees an opportunity to work with me (you), or it does not. Remember, they can come up with their own ideas. But production companies can’t come up with every idea. And some ideas/concepts can actually turn into good businesses. Of course, to the extent you can, you must make sure you have some protection, in case people rip off your idea.Then once I find the right production partner, I could call Target or Wal-Mart or another retailer, and tell them that I have a TV show called BABY 101TM. And, perhaps the retailer would like to start a co-venture. The retailer BUYS stuff from manufacturers and then SELLS that stuff to customers. Then why not have the retailer manufacture BABY 101TM themselves, since they already have stores that sell baby-related products? Why not have the TV show serve as an infomercial for a line of products? Baby 101 baby food. Baby 101 diapers. Baby 101 instructional books and videos. You get the idea.

  As the trademark holder, if I can get the retailer to go into business with me, then I participate in (in other words, make money from) every single step of the process.

  Martha Stewart, whom I’ve met and have long admired, achieved major success using a similar approach. Stewart knows how to cook. So what? Many people do. But what Martha Stewart did was to create the Martha Stewart brand—her name, her likeness, her persona, her aesthetic—and then used TV to launch that brand, and then implemented her business model by teaming up with retailers to sell several lines of Martha Stewart–branded products, from cookbooks to furniture.

  Remember, she wasn’t born with or given any of this, nor do they teach this in school, and no one was aware of a demand for Martha Stewart–branded products until she created the demand.

  She did it herself. So did Rachael Ray.

  So if you meet a person who tells you that he or she plans to create an industry around himself or herself, it may sound dumb.

  But, if they figure out how to implement their idea, then it’s an absolutely brilliant dumb idea.

  Implementation is what makes a dumb idea brilliant.

  THE ART OF MORE: PRINCIPLE #7

  BUILD, LABEL, AND SELL

  Hardly anyone who is successful (including myself) was born successful. Presidents of countries, corporate heads, rock stars, they all have one thing in common with you: they were born ordinary! The rest comes down to a few variables and a strong work ethic. Yes, luck sometimes plays some part in it. Yes, where you live might increase your chances of succeeding. Yes, who you associate yourself with impacts things greatly. Ultimately, however, it will come right back down to you. To YOU, and how you come off to people.

  Keep in mind that we are currently in the new age of business. The value of your name is dominated by computers and the Internet. In social media statistics, for example, KISS currently has more than 12 million fans on Facebook. However, I strongly advise everyone not to rely solely on computers to get the job done—they are merely tools at your disposal toward achieving your goals. But the bigger picture boils down (again) to you. When you sit down for a job interview, the people sitting across from you will put down your résumé and probably say, “So, tell me about yourself.” You are your own best résumé. This is your moment. It’s always the vacuum cleaner salesman, not the vacuum cleaner, that will make the sale.

  19

  The Importance of Being Able to Sell Yourself and Tell Your Story

  “This is a fantastic time to be entering the business world, because business is going to change more in the next ten years than it has in the last fifty.”

  BILL GATES

  cofounder and former chairman of Microsoft, investor, inventor, computer programmer, and philanthropist

  YOU are the business.

  YOU are your own boss.

  YOU are the BRAND.

  Here’s what I mean.

  Your reputation will precede you. Your name has to mean something. As in, “That guy always shows up on time, and always says what he means and means what he says.”

  Even before people meet you in social situations or job interviews, they will do due diligence on you. “Due diligence” means they’re going to do research on you, to find out what other people have to say about you. So by the time you finally meet someone, that person will already have an impression of you that’s either positive or negative. You want that first impression to be positive.

  That means, if the word on you is great before you meet for that job interview, you’re almost home free. And if
you continue to get stellar reports on your performance after you get that job, it won’t be long before you start climbing that ladder of success. It will certainly happen much faster than if you’re a schlump and just sit on your thumb.

  Brand is a word used to describe all sorts of things, including products. When you go shopping, you are often predisposed to buy this product, rather than that product, because you recognize the brand name and because you have a good impression of the brand name.

  If you look at YOURSELF as the brand, then you will understand an intrinsic truth: People judge. They judge everything. They evaluate everything. They will evaluate YOU. They will evaluate you before they meet you. And when they meet you. And once you’re gone. They will always have something to say about you before, during, and after. Because your brand, your reputation, will precede you and will always be with you.

  It is like a shadow. Your shadow goes wherever you go. So does your brand. Wherever you stand, your shadow will be cast. It is up to you to create a striking silhouette.

  It’s your responsibility, then, to build and control your brand. Your name. Your appearance. Your speaking skills. Your people skills. All of that needs to happen before you are even qualified to get that job.

  And once you get that job, you must continue to build and control your brand. That means that you must continue to protect YOU, since YOU are the brand. YOU are in charge of how you come off to people, and it’s your responsibility to change if the impression that you’re making on people isn’t a good one.

  If “YOU” isn’t working, then change “YOU.” Now.

  Some people change their looks every six months. Their hair color. Their mode of dress. Everything. They’re comfortable changing the look and continually try to figure out which look works better in the real world. At work, they may dress more conservatively. But in the evening, the jackets and ties come out, the skirts might get shorter and the heels higher. Women, especially in this visual way, are great marketers of themselves.

  Many women understand that the world judges you visually, and that if the visuals connect, then other facts matter. They recognize that fact, and make it work for themselves.

  They teach themselves how to put on makeup. They teach themselves how to be in fashion. In short, they teach themselves all sorts of skills that will increase their chances of success, based on what society has told them is valuable for a woman. Whether this is a good or bad thing is not the point. The point is that, whatever system you are a part of (be it fair or unfair), there are ways to get ahead in it. In the system of business, the modern woman and the modern man teaches themselves what they will need in order to compete.

  You’ll be judged by your name, your looks, your accent, your everything.

  It’s an old thought experiment: Two young men walk into a job interview at a law firm. They have similar résumés, backgrounds, and education. One is dressed just in jeans, the other in a suit. Which one gets the job?

  And remember, you’re not the only one out there. There are plenty of other ambitious people who want what you want, make a better impression than you make, are smarter than you are, are more qualified than you are, and are willing to work harder than you do.

  Life is competition. Like it or not, you will always be in competition with others. Which is why it’s important for you to be the caretaker of YOU.

  By the way, I keep capitalizing YOU to get your attention. To keep pointing back at YOU. To kick YOU in the butt and make YOU do it now.

  As the Nike people say, “Just do it.”

  In America, we are a multicultural melting pot where there is equal opportunity for all. Well, almost.

  Equal relative opportunity, for those with the same skills and abilities. But even then, the best of the best will get higher. Life and nature pick the strongest.

  “We are all created equal” is simply not true. Never has been and never will be. Some of us are born smarter. Some are born faster, live longer, are stronger, and so on.

  Once you recognize and understand that, you’ll begin to see that the only way you’ll beat the smarter/better-looking/younger/more experienced guy is simply to work harder and longer and never give up.

  “Equal opportunity” simply means that there’s lots of opportunity in America. It will never be “equal,” because the world is populated by human beings, and human beings have their prejudices. All of us. You. Me. Everyone.

  The United States of America is the richest country in the history of mankind (although China is soon to be). The United States is also one of the youngest countries. Other countries and cultures have been around for thousands of years. Yet in under two and a half centuries, America has been able to invent flight, develop the assembly line, put a man on the moon, and make all the other endlessly repeated accomplishments you tend to hear from people like me.

  Although we have a constitution that says that all people are created equal, that’s an ideal, not reality. Worth repeating: some people are born faster, some are smarter, some are shorter, some are fatter, some are thinner. We believe that our rights should supersede our inherent natures, supersede our DNA. Perhaps they should. But in the real world, they don’t.

  So we all have to fight for the rights we are guaranteed under the Constitution: to be treated equally under the law, and not to be profiled or incur prejudice and other notions, like being judged by what we look like and sound like.

  All good, except that you’re dealing with human beings. And I contend that human beings, either by nature or nurture or culture or religion, are fundamentally judgmental and prejudiced.

  First impressions are incredibly important. When you meet a new person, that person’s first impression of you will often make or break you. As the old saying goes, you only get one chance to make a first impression. Like it or not, other people will judge you.

  Members of just about every group have had to fight to overcome other people’s prejudices or preconceptions about them. Whatever their sources, those prejudices are a part of life, and they’re not likely to change drastically in our lifetimes. Or perhaps ever.

  Therefore, in the areas that you can control, you may as well do your best to make things work to your advantage. Let’s start with your outer appearance. How you dress. How you speak.

  Let’s say you’re a Hasidic Jew (and I was one) and you want to be a TV newscaster in America. So you arrive with your yarmulke, beard, fur-covered hat, and long black jacket, and you interview for the job. Now let’s say the TV station actually takes a chance on you and puts you on the air. How many people do you think would actually watch the evening news if it were hosted by someone who looks like you? You might have substance and important things to say, but viewers will judge you by your appearance, which will be alien to most Americans and thus unwelcome. I contend that the masses listen with their eyes, rather than actually listening to what is being said. Which is why there has never been a Hasidic newscaster on American television. And there likely never will be.

  Remember, I’m Jewish, so I’m not being anti-Semitic here. I’m just being pragmatic and pointing out that in the world we live in, your outward appearance is important, and that it’s particularly important if you plan on being a successful entrepreneur. Trees that don’t bend with the wind break in two.

  Be flexible.

  Get over yourself.

  So when you’ve got that big job interview, or you’re ready to meet with that banker or potential investor to launch that great big entrepreneurial venture, leave the yarmulke or dashiki or turban at home. You can proudly express your ethnicity, culture, and religion at home. But in business situations, wear the costume that your colleagues and potential benefactors will like. This means a nice haircut and a suit and tie if you’re a man. And if you’re a lady, don’t show too much skin or wear too much makeup. For better or worse, banks and financial institutions are still a boys’ club, and you should promote yourself and your skills, not what you look like. Otherwise, you will not be
treated seriously. Again—this is a prescription for success in business, not life. At no point in this book will I contend that I have the authority to decide how much skin women should or shouldn’t show, or what they should dress and look like. That is none of my business, if it’s not business. But in the business world, there happens to be a dress code for success.

  You wouldn’t wear loud, bright colors to a funeral, and you wouldn’t wear sexy clothes in a church, temple, or mosque. The same rules apply in business. If you own an auto repair shop or a tattoo parlor, or if you’re in a rock band, then you can ignore those rules. Otherwise, forget it. Maintain the proper appearance at the proper time, at the proper place, in front of the proper people.

  I’m sorry if I’m not being politically correct here, but if you’re looking for sugarcoating, go buy another book. I’m here to help you make the Big Money, not to tell you what you want to hear.

  A lot of people are afraid of offending you. I’m not. Because I’m one of you. Like millions and millions of other Americans, I wasn’t born in America. I look like I come from somewhere else. And millions and millions of you do, too.

  The difference between myself and a lot of other people is that I decided long ago that I would adapt as best I could, and that I would conform, to the extent that I could, to the inferred rules of culture in these United States of America. Yes, you heard that right—I’m a conformist.

  There are inferred social rules in every country, but in America, you have the choice to follow them or ignore them. But I contend, if you choose to ignore these rules, a much more difficult path to the Big Money lies ahead of you.

  Another thing: Do not use slang in business situations. Using words like dude and man in front of business professionals will make them think that you’re an idiot.

  Which leads to my next point.

  THE ART OF MORE: PRINCIPLE #8

  KNOW WHO YOU ARE SELLING TO

  Everything costs money, and people need to give you money for the service or product you offer for sale. You have to figure out how to get your stuff into their hands and get their money into your hands, and therein lies the big hurdle. How do you do that for the least amount of money on your part, for the most amount of money on theirs, and how do you get them to understand they can’t live without your stuff? You must know your audience, customers, clients, and what they are expecting from you.